Saturday, May 28, 2011

faking it

Last night I was asked to DJ at an exhibition featuring only pictures of naked girls (Duh).

So I make a bunch of CDs with girly bands like the Cardigans, Garbage, Hole, and probably Toxic by Britney Spears. I dress up like a Barbie and arrive early.

The artist asks me where my speakers are.

"What speakers?"

"What are you gonna play on?"

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, god."

We discover we both thought the other would bring whatever I'd be playing on (I don't even know the name for it because I'm not a real DJ). She starts to panic and I'm like "whatever let's just get a boom box? I'll ask that Chinese kid outside."

I give him money for a taxi and he returns with a tiny white CD PLAYER with about as much volume as my Nokia phone.

Then some other guys come in with a bed I'm apparently supposed to be performing on and I'm like "well I guess I'm not DJing but yes, thanks, my feet were starting to hurt."

People start coming in and there I am, laying in my bed, reading my book and playing my CDs on a prehistoric machine. I decide that they believe I'm part of the Art via a Living Installation Piece? Anyway.


In the end it couldn't have been better, as the boom box and I were a hit (I'm lying they hated me this was taken right before I was kicked out).

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