Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Desperately Seeking Anon

It's nice to know all I've gotta do for some attention is threaten to kill myself (see previous post). Until now I've only really gotten comments from people who got here by accident after a failed Google search for biscuits

and old high school rivals who now think I'm cool and want to win me over (that probably isn't true but I had to write something and "my parents" didn't have the same ring to it).

The only remarkable commenter before my Suicide Threat has been my doting "Anonymous." With Anonymous and me it was love at first sight-though I couldn't actually see him-but I knew he was hot and could feel his deep love (obsession) for me from Post One.

But like any relationship, ours had it's problems and I'm trying to see what went wrong...

Our courtship starts like any other-based around aggression and fear. Above he displays anger over the fact that I don't do what he wants (I have a LIFE, you know) (no I don't) and I gladly oblige to his needs. 

Anon and I are getting on well-he even helps me choose my outfits.

Though sometimes harsh, he supports my work and gives me the push that I need.

Why is he laughing? I feel annoyed. ("What the hell do you know about romance?")

Feeling we're drifting apart, Anon tries to win me back via buying this picture I took. (Didn't work)

Anonymous and I are unhappy. I start going out, drinking heavily and looking for love in new places.  He sees me spreading myself around town and gets insanely jealous.

Frustrated, Anon starts mocking me. I realize I've made myself vulnerable. My mother always warned me about Italians (but sadly not mozzarella).

Anonymous is a pervert. That's the one thing we really had in common and what kept me returning for more.

Well that's confusing-it seems Anonymous goes "both ways?"

Is he serious? I leave the country for a week and he starts checking out my boyfriends?

Ok since when is he a stylist? I swear this is the LAST TIME I fall for a gay!

He isn't making sense-I'm losing him.

What about MY shoes? Stop creeping other girls!

This is more like it-is he back on his meds? (And he's right, my legs are amazing). 

He's just trying to get me back...don't know if I should go there.

I hear makeup sex is the best-let's give it one more try?

Wait, I'm pretty sure this one's my Dad.


  1. haha! i wrote 'i think you're tops'!

    possibly my 2nd comment ever. Found your blog through slutever who i found through platform a year ago.

    I didn't write any of the other creepy comments though.

  2. Crying with joy because you posted my sexy cameltoe comment. I can go for make-up sex but I'll probably still be weeping throughout