Wednesday, May 30, 2012

[THE OTHER] GIRLS

Lena Dunham's getting lots of shit for her show "GIRLS" not being "diverse" enough/not representing all women and actually I totally agree because like, a show featuring FOUR FEMALE CHARACTERS should totally represent every single female (like how Sex and the City did) and I think it's especially misleading and offensive that the title of the show is so general and suggestive of being something important and wise. Anyway, I had Lena over today and she's trying to make up for her bullshit. 


Friday, May 25, 2012

Monday, May 21, 2012

HOW TO GET A JOB

Putas be complaining about the Bad Economy and the Lack Of Jobs and all this crap when it's like totally y'all's fault for now knowing how to do a Good Interview. 

Thursday, May 17, 2012

RIGHT BY MY SIDE

Nicki Minaj just released a new video featuring the terrifying and terrible Chris Brown and she's very sorry and is making it up to us now: 




PS- I know I say the wrong title at the beginning y'all sorry I got distracted by my striking image in photobooth .

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

LUCA, FRANCESCO, THE LAMB AND MY WIG

Last week I had the ~privledge~ to interview two special putas for my new Swide Talent's article: Film Producer/Ladies Man Luca Legnani and Film Director/Tattoo God Francesco Calabrese. 




The three of us had lots of fun talking about girls and boys and food and sex and how they're both basically jealous of my talent and will probably steal all my ideas to make a huge Hollywood film I'll never get credit for. And as a ~true journalist~ I recorded the interview via Photoboothing myself talking to them the whole time. I also wore my wig through some of it-here's a lil taste ;) 


video


 Y'all can obsess over read the interview HERE.  

Monday, May 14, 2012

FASHION SCHOOL DIARIES

This is the last month of Fashion Classes I'll ever have ever for the rest of my life and though afterwards I'll still have hella exams to do and a thesis to present next February (lolz I'm stuck here forever) I still can't help looking back on the past and feeling a bit nostalgic. 

Friday, May 11, 2012

LASCIATE MI PUTTANE

Anyone who's ever lived in Italy knows that Italians do this thing when they're driving where they try to run you over as you're crossing the street and it doesn't matter if the light is green or red or if you're wearing platform shoes or carrying babies, cars will go out of their way to be all Rihanna in "Man Down." I almost get hit by cars like every day so I'm used to it but last Wednesday it was worse than ever in that after I almost got hit by the same car TWICE, I showed my disapproval via "givin the finger" and I guess that wasn't "appropriate" retaliation for almost dying so the bastards followed me down the street, threw FRUIT AT MY FACE and eventually parked so they could chase me and yell at me till I ran into a restaurant to hide. "IT SHOULDN'T BE LIKE THIS," I thought to myself, as I ate the lunch I was forced to buy, while staring at the pieces of broken apple aimed for my head on the outside street. It shouldn't be like this. Then I realized, it's totez my fault cuz I'm just too "American" and that offends people so I really bring all this trouble on myself! Therefore I'm going Italiana!



Monday, May 7, 2012

ALL THE SINGLE LADIES IF I WERE A BOY

So last night I was complaining to my friend about how I never get any action in this stupid town and she was like "yeah I know what it's like to be like "I've already been with every hot guy in the room" and I was like "yeah I know but for me it's more like "I've already been with every hot and ugly and gay guy in this room" too." 

Saturday, May 5, 2012

HOW TO BE A LADY

I've been wearing this hella "ladylike" hat for the past few days and since then everyone from my professors to random old dudes to cats have been treating me really well so I've decided to become a ~Lady~


Tuesday, May 1, 2012

TEA'S PEEPING TOM

I have a legit Peeping Tom now and it's hella creepy and he makes me want to never open my window or leave my haus or watch Scooby Doo again and since the cops aren't helping me (should I bribe them with pizza?) I'll have to get rid of him on my own.