Thursday, December 18, 2014
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
WILLOW SMITH X WONDERLAND
I interviewed Teen Dream Willow Smith for Wonderland! It's my first cover story and y'all should be proud of me because my mom is. I've copy/pasted it below though the link is above though I've copy/pasted it below...though the link is also above :)
I had control over a magazine’s Facebook page for a day and could barely handle the pressure. When I ask how she can resist the urge to troll her 3.8M followers, she asks, “what’s trolling?” When she was younger she wasn’t allowed on social media, so now she’s careful. “When I was nine I would have written things like, “life sucks!” That didn’t fly.” When she turned teen, she was set free online and landed her first Instagram scandal.
My palms are sweating at Roc Nation and I’ve got nowhere to
wipe them. Glass, steel and leather surround me and my polyester pants
make palms worse. The blasting AC proves I’m not hot, just nervous, which
happens when I’ve got time. I was fine in that lax chair at the entrance but my
presence must have proved too pitiful for the public. Now I’m alone in a
conference room, seated at an enormous pearl table. Stress overwhelms me as I draft
a Tweet. A guy in a suit comes into the room to speak on his phone. He winks at
me and walks out. I press delete.
Moments after, a man in fancy sweats walks in, startled to see me. He leaves
quickly, before I can beg him to stay. I review my notes. A blonde stops by to remind
me that Willow is late. “Obama is in town and he’s causing traffic. You know
how he is!” Do I ever! I go to the bathroom to gawk in the mirror and dry off
my hands. The women roaming the halls are either in taut dresses with stilettos
or baggy pants and hoodies. I feel myself killing their vibe. I retreat to my
room and re-write my notes, in better handwriting. The page gets soaked. The
blonde pops in to promise that “she’ll be in soon!”
An hour later, I’m taken down a white hallway through huge
doors which reveal a plush space you know shit goes down in. Warm air blows
gently through vents, a soothing voice bounces between speakers, velvet couches
frame an obscenely panoramic view of Manhattan and sunlight slaps precious bottles
of golden liquor I don’t dare touch near a minor.
Willow Smith opens her arms. Come here. We hug and she apologizes for making me wait. I say, now
that you can blame the president for something, you’re practically an adult. “I
always feel like an adult, since I’m always having revolutionary thoughts.” Her
ideas are mature but her idealism is proof of her youth, which is always noted;
two adults sit in as chaperones. “We’ll jump on you if you ask anything
unacceptable.” Fair enough.
You know Willow is stunning on screen but in person she’s
flawless. I know writing stuff like that is not only cliché, but harmful. I’m
aware it promotes unrealistic standards, but she defies any standards I’ve ever
been tortured by! Her eyes are fit for a tiger and her elongated limbs look
capable of flying her through space. Appropriately, like some subculture
superhero, she’s wearing head to toe black—ripped skintight jeans, a VFILES turtleneck,
sneakers and a long, leather coat. “I love this coat because it makes me feel
like Spike from Buffy.” I know she’s been watching Buffy because I follow her
on Twitter. I also know that when she isn’t praising old shows, she’s spitting
profundities.
“The people who make
commercials promoting good health are the same people making Cheetos.” Oct 13
“Being a leader in the
1970's is unlike anything a kid of the 21 century will ever experience in a
lifetime.” Oct 7
“The most beautiful
thing about life could very easily be perceived as the most unfortunate.” Sep
23
Where does a fourteen year old get this stuff? Does she find
it in Marxist novels? Hypnotize it out of her parents? “I think a lot. That’s
the main thing I do in my life. Twitter is the way I can tell the world exactly
how I feel.” She’s been showing the world her potential since her acting debut
in “I Am Legend” in 2007. Her music
career followed in 2010 with the vibrant hit single, “I Whip My Hair.” She was the youngest artist to be signed to
Jay-Z’s Roc Nation label and has since been dropping dreamy singles like “5,”
featuring her brother, Jaden. Meanwhile, millions anticipate her next move.
I had control over a magazine’s Facebook page for a day and could barely handle the pressure. When I ask how she can resist the urge to troll her 3.8M followers, she asks, “what’s trolling?” When she was younger she wasn’t allowed on social media, so now she’s careful. “When I was nine I would have written things like, “life sucks!” That didn’t fly.” When she turned teen, she was set free online and landed her first Instagram scandal.
Her friend Aria posted an artistic photograph of himself on
a bed with her. Though they were both clothed and clearly platonic, the fact
that she was thirteen and he was twenty sent people through the roof. Sadly,
their negativity was directed at Willow and her family. Her parents (Will Smith
and Jada Pinkett Smith—duh) were
investigated by child services of Los Angeles County. They were cleared of any
suspicions, obviously, and handled it well, insisting that the public is
perverted for assuming anything was wrong with their daughter’s behavior. Still,
horrible comments lurk under her interviews, implying her attire and conduct is
inappropriate. Somehow, the fact that such comments are wildly inappropriate themselves
is lost on these people. The world has it out for girls; especially girls in
the spotlight.
Willow once regretted her fame. She longed to feel what it’s
like to go to a bookstore without having to call security. Luckily, she’s
learning to love it. “When you’re famous, you have more of a voice to change
the world. And that’s all I could ever ask for.”
“Girls and boys are
put in boxes when they’re born.” Aug 8
An icon for androgynous fashion, she’s outspoken about
gender issues. “Parents tell boys to go out and get dirty, climb trees and make
mud pies, while girls have to stay in and play with dolls. And often it’s not
the girls’ choice.” She explained, after reading “Gender Neutral Parenting.” She’s
named after her father and her brother is named after their mother (did you
ever catch that?). That’s just just a tiny glimpse at how well they’re being
raised. Having such a progressive, supportive and loving family can guide a
girl through what can be a troubling time. Studies have shown that while young
girls mostly feel good about themselves, their self-esteem plummets at puberty.
“I think that the reason why girls’ confidence falls during adolescence is
because of [popular] music. It’s all about boobs and butts. That’s what they’re
growing! They’re realizing that’s all they have to identify themselves with,
and it’s mostly a negative connotation. So when they think of themselves and
what’s happening to them, it automatically subconsciously makes them realize
that rappers [and other men] are disrespecting them.”
“Women are
systematically exploited by the system.” Aug 5
“I just went to see Gloria Steinem in Bell Hooks. It was an
amazing experience. To see women that powerful on a stage, speaking their
truth, is wow!” The unfortunate thing
is that we still need to have those discussions at all. And a lot of pop stars
and actresses fear owning up to the F Word. “People think ‘Feminist’ means ‘Man
Hater.’ When I first got introduced to feminism, I was introduced to the idea
of equality of the sexes.”
The world desperately needs someone like Willow to share
such ideas through her art; the only question is when more will arrive. She’s
taking her time. She notoriously pulled out of the re-make of Annie because she followed her instinct to
focus on school. She says she has enough songs to release an album but doesn’t
like them enough. That kind of honesty and intuition is rare. My peers and I are
rushing to accomplish our goals and have a constant, overwhelming sense of
“FOMO,” it’s a wonder someone can be so patient in the age of over-sharing.
“I believe that everything that has ever happened was meant
to. If you’re somewhere but want to be somewhere else, you’re not experiencing where
you are now. Each song I put out is about where I am and need to be. I take it
step by step.” And that way she’ll end up with quality work. “My goal is to
spread the message of consciousness shift and paradigm shift. We need to come
to a point in the world where everything is running off of love. That’s what
I’m trying to get to, that’s what I want to do with my music.”
Willow believes in meditation and limitless happiness, and knows
it’s important to laugh. She cracked the world up with a viral Vine poking fun at
her brother’s conspiracy theories. “My brother and I have such a good
relationship because we aren’t forced to be with each other all the time. Most siblings have to hang out and their
parents are like, “you’ve got to love each other!” And they’re like, “dang, I
don’t feel like it!” Jaden and I have had our separate lives. We do our own
thing, we don’t question each other. We connect on a friend level.” They also
respect each other as artists. “There’s things that he’s done that the world
has never heard. I’m on the edge of my seat waiting to see how they will react.”
“I have many things to
learn, and conditionings to understand.” Aug 21
This issue’s theme is Eternal Youth. What does she hope to
hold onto as she grows? “I feel like, when you grow up, it’s the conditionings,
the things people teach you that hold you back. Like, “I’ve got to be serious
now! I’ve got to pay taxes!” Without those conditionings, you can be free and
be yourself. That’s what will carry me through my life. I’m here to change the
world and be a servant to the great divine and I’ll carry that path. My life is
meditation, crystals, self-improvement and art.”
It’s good to have a desired path but it’s also important to
accept transition which transcends hairstyles. “Flexibility with yourself and
with your looks shows self-confidence. You’re willing to paint on your canvas with
whatever comes from within you. I love doing whatever with my hair to shock the
world. People have such eyes on my family that when you do something out of this
world, it’s such a big deal, and I like that!” For the record, her hair is
short and blonde as I write this, though it most likely won’t be by the time
you read.
Her and Jaden have stressed how school isn’t as important as
living life. I always felt that way so I always skipped school, but is it
possible to balance both? “It’s gotten to the point where the youth needs to
realize their power. With realizing their power comes realizing what’s not good
for them and realizing which rules people are enforcing on them aren’t letting
them grow. For kids who are in school and trying to understand themselves and
their spirituality, it’s difficult. I went to school for one year and I was
like, now I understand.”
Like most teens, Willow spends the time she isn’t planning
revolutions on Tumblr. She even checks up on her fans. “I visit their blogs and
read everything they write me. They make art for me and I enjoy it so much! I love
being connected to them.” Her Tumblr ‘about me’ reads, “I think of myself as an extension of source energy - always gathering
information, spreading love and being free.”
The adults clear their throats and my time is up. We hug and
she tells me something generous and I believe it. With many young artists or “stars-in-the-making,”
you can predict what will come of them, or at least assume what they hope to become.
With Willow, you have freaking clue. Even when you stare into those emoji eyes
you can only guess she’ll surprise us all.
“Guess I was born to
make mistakes. But, I'm not scared to pave the way.” Aug 29
Oh, I almost forgot. Of course I asked if she ever uses her
dad’s famous song against him. “About a
week ago I told my mom, “parents just don’t understand” and I wished my dad
could have been there. It was the first time I had ever said it, which is
surprising.”
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
Sunday, September 21, 2014
HARD ON FOR HOOLYWOOD
I missed the N.HOOLYWOOD runway because of bad traffic and by that I mean shirtless male models. The designer met with me afterwards so I could squeeze in an interview and avoid getting fired. He was really sweet, according to his translator. Watch if you love stylish subtitles :@)
Friday, September 19, 2014
VENUSX and LUAR ZEPOL
Backstage at Luar Zepol they had pizza, candy and glamorous gusts like VenusX, [the other] Prince and the Candy Kids creator! I got to chat with them all while riding a sugar rush. Czech it out y'all!
Thursday, September 18, 2014
YOUTUBE OR NOT YOUTUBE
Hey y'all! Does your grandma know about Youtube? I'm kidding, of course I'm subscribed to her channel! Hemorrhoid Cream Dream Cake is one of my faves! Anyway, my boss didn't know that Vimeo is a dead site created for ball-breaking-video-makers who hate the concept of views. That's where Bullett TV was hosting my stuff for months while I silently cried on the inside (JK, I do all my crying loudly and publicly). After arguing and fighting and eventually winning my battle ~of the sexes~ I was able to create our first Youtube Channel *applause* so now you've got to subscribe so I can prove to my boss that we Did The Right Thing. Watch the latest Everything is Embarrassing episodes (and re-watch them and re-re-watch them) as well as some new Fashion WEAK interviews!!
How are y'all doing? On a scale from one to the Backstreet Boys how much do you miss me?
How are y'all doing? On a scale from one to the Backstreet Boys how much do you miss me?
Thursday, July 3, 2014
Saturday, June 28, 2014
Thursday, June 26, 2014
SEXERCISM
We've all been there: you can't get someone out of your head so you let someone else into your bed with some warm bread and y'all play dead and while giving head? IDK what the kids are doing these days but I do know that SEXERCISM is a common practice, especially during men's fashion week. Check it out in my WOVO series below!
Sunday, June 22, 2014
EVERYTHING IS EMBARRASSING
Neglecting a blog is kind of like leaving a boyfriend.
You're full of heartbreak and regret. You're losing your sense of self and purpose. You should just forget, yet there he is, taunting you on your bookmarks. I miss posting on here daily but not doing so has helped me be able to do other stuff, like write a book nobody will publish, get my roots done every three weeks and create a show for Bullett TV!
The first episode is with Petra Collins and it's super awkward.
I'll post the rest of the episodes here, too, so I hope the three of y'all that still follow me here appreciate it, since writing this post brought up some gnarly Post-Traumatic-Blogging-Disorder.
PS: I'm also werqing on a new video series for WOVO, check that out here:
You're full of heartbreak and regret. You're losing your sense of self and purpose. You should just forget, yet there he is, taunting you on your bookmarks. I miss posting on here daily but not doing so has helped me be able to do other stuff, like write a book nobody will publish, get my roots done every three weeks and create a show for Bullett TV!
The first episode is with Petra Collins and it's super awkward.
I'll post the rest of the episodes here, too, so I hope the three of y'all that still follow me here appreciate it, since writing this post brought up some gnarly Post-Traumatic-Blogging-Disorder.
PS: I'm also werqing on a new video series for WOVO, check that out here:
Friday, February 7, 2014
VIDEO HONEY PT TWO
Hey y'all here's my second video for WIRED! New York is cold and I'm feeling old this fashion week, running on icy toes. Can anyone find me a publisher, please?
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
WIRED VIDEO HONEY PART ONE
As Beyonce knows some things are meant to be kept secret and as I know other things become secret by default because they're restricted to an iPad application nobody wants to pay for.
Since September I've been making monthly videos to go along my monthly Action! column for Wired Italy, though I'm sure most of y'all don't know that since the column has always been in print (in Italy and Italian) and the videos are on the iPad application even I don't have.
Anywhoo after pleading the Wired dudes have finally agreed to start showing my old videos on their website and here's the first.
You may not understand the Italian but fart sounds are a universal language.
You're welcome.
PS: I've been in NYC almost a week and I'm not famous yet what gives?
Since September I've been making monthly videos to go along my monthly Action! column for Wired Italy, though I'm sure most of y'all don't know that since the column has always been in print (in Italy and Italian) and the videos are on the iPad application even I don't have.
Anywhoo after pleading the Wired dudes have finally agreed to start showing my old videos on their website and here's the first.
You may not understand the Italian but fart sounds are a universal language.
You're welcome.
PS: I've been in NYC almost a week and I'm not famous yet what gives?
Saturday, January 11, 2014
WHAT YOU'VE NEVER SEEN A HYPOCRITE BEFORE
I'm back online with a new article for VICE Italy, here's the english version:
“You can’t outsmart life,” my ex says at dinner. He and his friend
got babies and insist I will, too. “You don’t control your destiny.” If there’s
one thing I control, it’s my body. The weather’s freezing but I’m nearly naked
because admiration keeps me warmer than fur. And I’m starving but ignoring my
salad so I can get wasted. “Most women can’t fight for a lifestyle and men
stand for nothing so they let mistakes determine their future. But I’ve got a
plan, and it’s all me.” I declare, pouring too much vinegar on my food so I won’t
be tempted by it. “That’s what all girls say, see you in ten years, mom!”
Why must men insist on ruining my buzz with their midlife
crises? When the old ones can no longer use your body as a means to escape
their reality they try to drag you down with them. I stumble to the bathroom to
stare in the mirror for ten minutes and promise my reflection to do whatever I
can to prove them wrong. And to invest in anti-wrinkle cream because I turn
twenty-five in the morning.
“You look ready for rape,” another ex greets me. He’s
charming as ever, meanwhile my crush is avoiding me, the girl I’m here for
disappeared with him and I have an exam in the morning. I’ll outsmart life,
starting with this dinner. I escape, call a cab and study until daylight. Despite
everyone I feel invincible and ready to conquer my next year as a brave, ruthless
vixen! (If I pass Art History).
Are you taking
control in 2014? Is your first resolution to stop drinking, as soon as you finish
the bottles leftover from the NYE party you threw and nobody came to? Second,
to find more reliable friends? Third, you’re buying new running shoes online this
instant! You know which workout to do at the gym you can’t afford a membership
to, since you spent all your money at Nike. Fifth resolution, be responsible with
finances. Good for you. But if the shoes don’t fit you can be a hypocrite. Take
it from me, it isn’t so bad if it happens slowly. I’m twenty-six now, and I can
say I’ve kept one of the promises from that mirror at dinner: my skin is
flawless.
“In order to reach my potential, I must remain single. I’ve
dedicated my life to empowering girls. I will continue to ruin my reputation
and therefore any chance of a relationship for their sake. I’ll work hard to become
rich and famous enough to help them. That’s all I care about.” A boy asked
about my goals as a feminist and I’m telling him, yelling, slamming my fists
and making him uncomfortable, or so I thought. Maybe not, or now he wouldn’t be
my husband.
If you must know, the wedding was in Malibu. A small
reception, like Hole’s music video, with less nipples and more moms. I kept it secret, like Beyoncé’s album. For
the record, my hair was perfect. My only regret is having deprived y’all from
my prep tips, like how to lose ten pounds in two days (laxatives), which dresses
hide Writer’s Ass (I’ll explain later), what to do if your period arrives on
The Big Day (cancel the ceremony) and which mascara is best for crying (Lancôme).
Wait, didn’t I write an article against marriage, declaring it
useless and anti-feminist? Yes, I also wrote about how shitty New York is and now I’ve
moved here. So? I know the only creative people making it are selling their asses to do so, but it’s
the only place I can sign my name on the Fame
Waiting List and get invited to Lena Dunham’s pizza parties. When did my
hypocrisy start? Probably when I resolved to be more slutty in 2013, only to end up in the most
important monogamous relationship of my life.
I thought San Francisco was a great idea. I moved across the
street from the Armory where Kink.com porn is filmed and as that was my
favorite site, I considered it a sign.
But when I went inside it was Eyes Wide
Shut if the cloaks were replaced with furry hats, the models swapped with
Twitter Execs and Tom Cruise couldn’t stop dropping “Burning Man.” That was
just foreshadowing. Everyone in town was so sloppy my style slowly deteriorated
from Mafia Mistress on Holiday to Librarian on Laundry Day. Meanwhile, the
little cash I had was sucked into the pockets of homeless crack heads and my
self-esteem flew out the window.
I took three months off from my blogs and this column to write
a book, an experience I don’t wish on anyone. Someone once joked that authors
are writers too ugly for television. But what came first, the ugly or the process?
I spent most days crusted in soy sauce, showering only to change into different
pajamas, developing what I call Writer’s Ass, a pancake between your legs and
back, as a result of constant sitting. I mourned my butt and missed my blogs.
Not getting immediate feedback I’m used to online, I felt in the dark,
unappreciated and totally irrelevant, probably like the other members of
Destiny’s Child did.
Speaking of pop stars, comparing yourself to them is an easy
way to track your own progress. Beyoncé sings, “I took some time to live my life, don’t think I’m just his little
wife” so we’re on the same page. Britney’s making a comeback in Vegas, and
I feel her. We both must reclaim what we own, remind our fans why they love it (hence
all the links before, you’re welcome) and knock down whoever’s gotten in our
way since. It’s hard to do, if you’ve changed. Like Gaga, I’ve been wearing
comfortable shoes and getting too close to nature. She once proclaimed she’d
rather die than let her fans see her in flats, and now she’s barefoot. If you can’t
practice what you preach, who are you?
The difference between being single and having a boyfriend
is when you’re at a bar you don’t spend the whole time looking around desperately
for a dick to sit on and can focus on drinking instead. The difference between
that and being married is you don’t go to the bar, you ask your husband to
bring a glass with ice in it because the bottle’s already in bed with you. What
I’m saying is, you can’t outsmart life, but if you’re smart you can keep the
right parts about yourself alive regardless.
PS: No, I’m not pregnant. But if I ever am I’ll drink for
two.
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